In Genesis, Christ reminds us of the true meaning and worth of marriage: God created man and woman who are to leave their mother and father and unite as one; and what God has brought together as one, must not be separated.
But God created man and woman, having not only different physical aspects, but also different mental, emotional and psychological aspects. The man is single focused and must use his strength and power to provide for the good of his family and for the good of the community in which he finds himself. His lifelong battle is to stay focused on the good he can provide; he must battle against the innate desire for companionship and union with other women.
The woman on the other hand is not single focused but is concerned with many situations and problems that arise within the family; her battle is not to get lost in a seeming overload of emotions in dealing with these many difficulties. The good woman learns to do this while being provided the security and safety she needs from a well focused man.
A man can awaken to a day filled with anxiety and feelings of worthlessness. When this happens the good woman, in her respect and love for the man reassures him of his worth, of his goodness, reminding him of all the good that he has done within the family, for the family and the community outside of the family. In a case such as this a man is brought back to his original focus and sense of worthiness.
But if the woman is not capable or willing to respect and reassure the man, or if the man is unable to understand the reassurance of the woman, he may yield to his weakness, seeking the affection of other women, even in prostitution, to try to restore his true focus. On the other hand, if the man does not yield to these instinctive desires, and lacking a woman who, perhaps having yielded to her weakness of being controlled by her emotions, may criticize and nag the man to such an extent that the man is not removed from his darkness in the way that God intended, the good man has no other recourse but to turn to God in weeping and confusion, asking for help in restoring his focus. The good man will receive instant assistance from the Lord, if he prays with faith, truly believing that what he asks for will be done for him.
The good woman who receives from the man the love and respect due her, along with the security and safety of the entire family, is best capable of winning her battle to keep her emotions under control. If the man does not provide these things for the woman and if she does not, in turn, seek these things from another man, she likewise will turn to the Lord for help which she gets immediately when she prays as Jesus instructs us, to pray believing that what we ask for will be done for us.
One of the best examples in history of a good man and a good woman in marriage that comes to mind is St. Margaret of Scotland, who having come up from Hungary in the time of the Norman conquest of England by William of Normandy in 1066, journeyed to Scotland and married Malcolm, the King of Scotland. She loved and provided for the poor and provided the love and respect for her husband, becoming the mother of three sons who became kings. Her love was reciprocated by Malcolm in wanting to do whatever she asked for; she died within days of his being killed in battle.
There are probably many examples of good marriages as the above where the woman, seemingly in the background and having no other effect than taking care of the family concerns, is in reality the prime mover of good accomplished through her man, by her respect for and reassurance of his worthiness and goodness in his moments of darkness.
Don't forget Proverbs 31.
ReplyDeleteErvin